My melon and white vintage swim suit hugs my hips and ruffles down to my mid thigh. It ties around my neck and shows off my shoulders which are perhaps my most beautiful feature even though up until recently I have never shown them. I have always been particularly modest, partially due to body insecurities and partially due to my nature. I'd rather be iconic than sexy. I would rather be classic than seductive. I would rather be Jade.
This time last year, he called me on the phone. I was ecstatic to hear from him. I hadn't in days. He had anger in his tone the moment I answered. I didn't know what was wrong.
"You okay? What's got you down?"
I asked.
"I can't even enjoy my vacation because I feel guilty every time I see a girl in a bikini. It's like I think back to you in my head and just know you're worried about the fact that I am looking at girls in bikinis."

I honestly hadn't even thought about it until he told me. At the time I chalked it up to our arguing that he'd felt that way. But now I just chalk it up to him telling on himself.

That's the difference I suppose,

between him and the type of guy that I want to have.

I look in the mirror and my hair is long now...past my shoulders. I am in shape, though my cheeks are still round and rosy and my frame is soft. The sun kisses my freckles and my freckles kiss it back. Finally, I have no body hang ups...they left

when he did.

  I have an artist's hands. My skin always glistens, I always leave glitter behind; I think it naturally follows me wherever I go. Some boy will love to hold those hands. Some boy will love that glitter that flakes off on his shirt. Some boy will love my hips and my round shoulders and my rosy cheeks and my ambitious eyes. Some boy will love this poet. He won't be drooling over carbon copy morrocan beach goddesses in Florida because I will be enough. I will be enough for someone... someone who actually has character. Someone who actually values the right things. Someone who can be faithful. Someone who is actually good enough For a poet like me.